Primrose Everdeen a Hunger Games Fanfiction
by jacklovesmcr
Summary: what were Primrose's true feelings about her sister volunteering for her


Primrose Everdeen…

A victor's sisters story

Although watching my older sister, my best friend, volunteer for me, i knew if she didn't i would be dead the day the day the games started. I could always imagine Katniss killing animals and things but the thought of her killing someone, a living person, with parents and siblings, cousins and family, she'd have to kill that person, just to survive herself, and that was the brutal truth, but i knew, i knew it, i knew Katniss was going to win, she promised me she wouldn't die, and that meant if she wouldn't die then she had to kill someone to stay alive. The worst part of it was that she was with Peeta; she doesn't know that I know what happened with the loaf of bread, but I was walking to candy stall in the hob because I'd been good at school and Mom had given the last few pennies she had from selling her last remedy. So as I walked to the hob to buy some confectionary, there Katniss was sitting behind the bakery with tears streaming down her face, I didn't know why, but I knew it must've been something very serious for her to cry, in all the years of being alive, I didn't recall seeing her cry, only that once, then Peeta's mother came out and shouted at Katniss saying something along the lines "get off of my land!" or something. Then Katniss started running. To the front of the house, That's when I though I better go in case she sees me and knows I know what just happened, so there I was strolling to the Hob, and then I was there. At the hob, I walked over to the sweet's counter and passed my pennies over and said "have you got anything I can have for this? I know it's not much, but I'd like to share it with my family" the woman looked at me sweetly and said

"Yes dearie" with a sweet smile on her old face. "I have two options for you, sweet butter fudge with fresh butter coming from my husbands cows or a delicacy of district 12, coal colored candy cane" she smiled. I don't really like the district 12 delicacy candy cane so I decided to go for the bag of butter fudges; she took the fudges from a big bag and then placed six pieces of fudge into a smaller bag, which she then handed me, six fudges, eh? That meant two for each of us. Two fudges for me, Katniss and also our Mom. I started walking home. Just trudging through the muddy paths of district 12. Avoiding the deepest muddy puddles, trying to make sure my shoes didn't get wet. As I got closer and closer to home I noticed Mom sitting out there crying. And then I remembered that I couldn't give two of the candies to Katniss. She was away fighting for everybody in our district to show the Capitol that District 12 is not a small useless little space in the dirt to the west of Panem. But knowing that she would probably die made me break down, shed be stuck with the careers, those who were trained to kill or be killed and those who were trained for years in the art of arm to arm combat, and even armed combat. I hoped she wouldn't die and I begged and prayed that she'd win. But I knew if she did win then, my sister would be a murderer. A killer. I broke down crying this deep, deep depression overtook me. I wanted just to curl up in a corner of an empty room, where no one ever went and to just fall asleep and never wake up. I wanted to die. I wanted my life to stop and I wanted to never wake up. To never ever grow up. To never provide my mother with the grandchildren she most desperately wanted. Then I thought about mom, what would she do If both I and Katniss were dead? She'd have no reason to live. She would just be a hollow shell of woman; who already calls herself a failure, can you imagine her, if her two babies were dead, her two creations. She'd find herself more of a failure. She'd call herself useless and then she'd have nothing. She might as well be dead. I know it's wrong to think about your mother in that way, but when you're faced with depression like this, emotions come out of you that you didn't even know existed.

Like when someone dies, you know they're in a better place now, but you want them, still you want the person in your arms and in your sight. I know that's not right, but to be honest that's life. Not much you can do really. I walked home slowly and silently, among the crowds of the residents of district 12. People just looked at me with sympathy in their eyes, one of them, an old lady, the lady from the candy stall in the hob. She came and she rested her hand on my shoulder, I shrugged her off and run home, when I got home, I jumped onto the hay filled mattress and slept, I don't know how long I slept for, I don't care.

A few days later I dared to open my eyes, this was the day, the day the 74th annual hunger games started, I didn't want to watch, but the Capitol makes you watch. So I woke up and my mother dragged me to the square, where day ago; my sister was chosen to fight for this useless unloved place known as district 12, what a shithole. I wish she never volunteered for me, she's so much more useful and more popular, and she was, she was… she was just special.

After the half hour walk, we arrived in the square. And that was when the big screen lit up, and the image of Katniss and that little baker boy Peeta flew up onto the screen. And we heard the minute countdown "60. 59. 58. 57. 56. .." the screen flickered and a new setting was displayed, it was a grassy patch of land in the middle of a green forest. When the countdown reached thirty seconds, the tributes, rose up, through these holes in the ground. When their heads were submerged in light, they all looked suddenly dazed then the camera panned on to Katniss. Everyone cheered and screamed. At point Gale came over to me, I guess he got the day off work in the mines, to see the girl he secretly loved fight the hunger games for district 12.

"3. 2. 1…" that was it the hunger games had officially begun, I looked at Katniss she didn't move for about two seconds, but by the time she realized she was late, she didn't dare head to the cornucopia, then the camera panned away from her and onto the baker boy, he was already at the cornucopia and he had already killed someone, from another district, I couldn't remember his name though, he was tall and good looking.

That night was the hardest ever, she had found out Peeta was selling her out to the careers, that night, I knew she was going to die, I thought once or twice, why am I even alive, what is the fucking point? But I stayed sane; I had to for my mom. Things had always been tough here in district 12 but not this tough, I slid blades across my skin, just to kill the pain of knowing that my sister was going to die. I felt like total shit, no one knew how I felt, no one did! No one does! The pain inside was like the worst pain I had ever felt, was this what Katniss felt like when daddy died in the mines? I used to pretend I was asleep when mother went to bed, I would go out on walks in the meadow, and I'd sit on the cliff that she sat on with Gale. I sit there for hours. Until the sun started coming up, then id head into the square, and see the updates from the capitol about what happened last night did Katniss die, did Peeta successfully sell her out to the careers. The answer was no. when I knew she was safe for now, I cried, knowing she was safe for now, even if it wasn't for long made me cry tears of happiness. But then a notice came through, saying Katniss had witnessed the death of the youngest tribute Rue, Katniss had watched that poor girl die, she had seen an arrow going through her back and through her chest, that's something no one should have to witness, the death of an ally. But that girl that was dead gave my sister more of a chance of winning and coming back, to us, to district 12, home. It wasn't much of a home, but a house isn't just a house, a house is a home; and a house that's a home's got a heart in it. And that heart is yours; home is where the heart lives.

It's crazy to think your government would make young people fight to the death a large arena, I heard legends about the old country a hundred years ago, called _America_, apparently if people had troubles they would go to the government for help, they're government did not terrorize them, didn't kill young people, they nourished and cared for young people, and they looked after their young. WHAT A PLACE! I would love to live there as an equal. As a real person in a real _America. _

Katniss and I have spoken about the old country on numerous occasions but mom stopped us because "it was dishonest, and shouldn't be spoken about…" I suppose she was just trying to stop us from being caught talking about it, by the peacekeepers. This was it I supposed the last day of the games, I knew Katniss was going to die, I knew it, she wasn't as good as these careers, these career tributes trained from when they were 6 to volunteer and kill people for fame and fortune, the truth of it sickens me to the stomach, that our power and savior would actually do this to us and make us out to be little cocks fighting in a big ring, never trust the government never trust the Capitol, they're barbarians well at least that was Katniss used to say, I was starting to distrust what Katniss had ever said to me because she promised to return from the Capitol as the district 12 victor, living in the victors village was always my dream, the big grey stone cottages were so cute, but I knew that she'd never return. That was the day, I honestly felt like killing myself knowing that my lifeline was going to die. I went to sleep early that night and had numerous nightmares, I screamed and cried and wept in my sleep, I wasn't sure what I wanted to die, life was fucking me over and I could do nothing about it, I could literally do nothing! That morning I didn't bother going to the square because I knew the nights update would have told me that she was dead, that was really the end. Really truly and properly the actual fucking end, I knew It Katniss was dead, after about an hour of lying with Buttercup( my cute little kitty cat) I heard a knock on the door, I opened it a crack. I saw a guy, I knew the guy it was Gale. He stood there with flowers in his hand, you know what you naturally assume when you see someone holding flowers at your door, with a glum like face.

"what is it?" I asked "what do you want!" I shouted

"I wanted to sa.."

"you wanted to say sorry, I know shes dead shes never coming back why do celebrate it with a bouquet of fl…"

"DEAD!?" he shouted puzzled " I came to say congratulations, she won! She won the 74th hunger games"

"SHE WON! SHE ACTUALLY FUCKING WON!?" I screamed the tears streamed down my face, tears of happiness of course. My best friend, my sister andf my lifeline was alive, and the capitol was looking down on her and look what she done. She beat all the mother fuckers and won the hunger games Fuck yes! That night I really honestly could not sleep at all, knowing that my Katniss was going to be back tomorrow in my arms just excited me so much that I cried all night long, I was so happy, even happier than when Mom said yes to letting me keep buttercup. It was honestly the most amazing feeling ever. But then my thoughts changed, what about the parents who have lost children because of my sister, what if they know that Katniss Everdeen killed their child and they can't do shit about it. But still I had katniss back and that is what was important to me this was honestly th best feeling in the world. After much thinking and probably overthinking, I fell asleep. I was woken up by the sun, it was an actual sunny day is district 12, this rarity was going to be good welcome for my big sis.

Many hours and hairstyle experiments later, the train arrived, pulled up on the platform the large crowd of us waited there, and as the doors opened we all stayed silent, and as Katniss' foot appeard walking out of the carriage, the crowds screamed and cheered and chanted, all for my big sis. By the time she got to me flowers were all over the floor, people had spent money, that they didn't have onm flowers to welcome her home. Then I realised, people were also throwing small yellow flowers at me, they were primrose flowers! My namesake. Then Katniss came over to me smiled and said "how's that tail little duck?" she asked, the last thing she said to me was "tuck in that tail little duck" and she remembered that joke

"it's good.." I replied. She smiled and pulled me in hugged me in the warmest hug ever, and she kissed my head. And said

"I love you.."

"I love you too" I replied

La fin j'espère que ça vous a plu…

Au revoir


End file.
